My Name is Eric Print

Synopsis

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No one can argue with the cliche that a dog is "Man's Best Friend" from time immemorial. But has anyone ever looked behind this airy statement to see what Man's Best Friend is really like INSIDE of him? His thoughts, his perceptions of life and how he sees his relationship with us?

This is the story of Eric, a precocious, irreverent male Pomeranian and is told from HIS perspective of life and how he views his best friend, Man! It is a delightful story filled with a myriad of emotions ranging from tear jerking touching moments to Eric's humorous and satirical descriptions of his relationship with his family and all the other humans who have the misfortune of crossing his path!

"My name is Eric and a piece of gilt edged, important looking paper says I am a male Pomeranian of retired champion and show dog bloodline, place and date of birth, a remote dog breeding farm, deep inside rural New South Wales, Australia on the 16th of Dec, 1997" is how he declares himself!

What does Eric have to say about his relationship with Man?

"It was as if some kind of magnetic power flowed between us and I felt loved, strangely reassured and protected. I didn't know it then but this was my first contact of what would be a life long love affair with humans and it made me feel safe and comfortable in an increasingly perplexing world."

"My first lesson of human interaction, that dogs and their human friends spend a lot of time misunderstanding each other so someone has to give up and go along with the other at some point and well, simply make the best of the results!"

"But no matter how much we may misunderstand each other, the unconditional love and loyalty "till death do us part" that we offer to our masters give true meaning to the time immemorial saying, "Dog, Man's Best Friend."

This is how Eric sees his mom!
"I knew straight away that I could manipulate her and turn her round my little paw in any direction I wanted! I called the shots and she ran, it was wicked and thoroughly shameless of me to capitalize on my mom's weakness for small furry things with big round eyes!"

"Actually, I understood everything straight away but I let them enjoy their condescending game of teaching a raw, intellectually inferior puppy the ropes. I obligingly peed by mistake on the kitchen floor and let them rub my nose in it and bring me to the newspaper to show me where I had gone wrong. It was all a game to me and I enjoyed it thoroughly!"

We follow Eric through his journey to dog spas, dog funerals and a whole horde of crazy activities and here is what he had to say about them!

"And ok, I hate to admit it but I was more than a little curious about this craze that was razing the pet community like a raging bush fire. It tickled me pink to see those glossy brochures of dogs lying in tubs of bubbling water surrounded by flowers and glowing tea candles, God, what were all those humans thinking of?"

""I was glad when the funeral was over and we could return to the world of the living, this death thing was much too morbid and depressing for me and I am by nature a very life orientated dog to whom death is just a remote possibility and the present is more important."

The long list of Eric's mishaps even includes an incident when he toppled down an urn of cremated human ashes!

"It would be our little secret that Aunty Meri's father in law now shares his urn with quite a bit of charcoal ashes and Lisa, much to my amusement, cautioned me not to let slip. God, did she forget I am a dog and speaks a language no one understands?"

This thoroughly irreverent Rogue Pomeranian has fetishes and "bargains" with his family over his own misbehavior!

  "What about growling and dancing around and snapping but not touching "the enemy?" she asked.

I thought about that and we finally agreed on dancing, just short of touching as a scare tactic only and that way, no blood is drawn, no one gets hurt and my family doesn't live in fear of law suits!"

His love for the high jinks leads him through some dare devil life threatening incidents!

 "For a moment I froze and thought I'd had it and I could see my Obituary flashing by me, "Eric, male Pomeranian, dead, aged four years. Cause of death, foolhardiness."

His favorite quote?

"Well, they don't say it's a dog's life of being misunderstood, misinterpreted and misquoted for nothing!"


To be published and released in 2007

Виола была красавицей и, как большинство красивых девушек, кокеткой.

Генри послушно зажмурился, лицо его напряглось, колени стучали "Книги для айфона формат"друг о дружку.

Обо всем этом думал Чиун, "Доклад о растениях красной книги"восторженно приветствуя Харолда В.

Ответственность и продуманное намерение совершенно разные вещи.

Имеется подтверждение в новейшей, слишком абстрактной для меня, физической теории.

Я сдаюсь, проговорил "Скачать музыку бесплатно моло"Джиро Исудзу, когда на него упала несущая холод смерти тень.